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#ActualKoobazaur

Posted 03 March 2013 - 01:48 PM

Honestly I believe many self-diagnosed aspergers are people going through a social-awkwardness phase. Problem is, many never get out of it.

To destroy my credibility further with more anecdotal examples, when I was a freshman at college I was the guy who avoided parties to instead sit in his room and either do homework (straigh-A over-achevier) or code his geeky game projects. I was awkward as heck and the notion of even talking to a girl was doomed to failure before its conception. In a nutshell, I was the perfect candidate for the an "aspie."

But luckily, I somehow made friends. Friends with whom I interacted. Friends who introduced me to alcohol (hello college). Friends who took me out to parties. Friends who gave me advice on girls. And my campus was small (400 students) with a focus on community and supporting each other which further made thigns easier.

By my senior year, I've been one of the few main guys regularly hosting hangouts and parties, started dating, and had no problem meeting new people and being sociable... while still keepign up my As and coding my geeky projects.

My point is, it took work and sometimes pushes from others to help me develop my social skills and become, well, a "normal and functinal member of the society" (whatever that even means). But I can see how many people, particularily at big (20-30k+ student) campuses can miss out on this supportive social group and instead remain in their little asocial shell, eventually giving up and excusing it as aspergers.

Of course, I am not denouncing aspergers - it's a real disorder and I know a few people who have it. Yes, copious social interaction have helped them adjust, but there's still some awkwardness and you can tell it's more of a learned "acting" than natural social intuition. Those people are constantly thinking of how to act, really struggling on the inside, and can never fully overcome the disorder; but it's different from those who merely think they have aspergers because they never tried, or didn't have the right support group, to overcome it.

#4Koobazaur

Posted 03 March 2013 - 01:47 PM

Honestly I believe many self-diagnosed aspergers are people going through a social-awkwardness phase. Problem is, many never get out of it.

To destroy my credibility further with more anecdotal examples, when I was a freshman at college I was the guy who avoided parties to instead sit in his room and either do homework (straigh-A over-achevier) or code his geeky game projects. I was awkward as heck and the notion of even talking to a girl was doomed to failure before its conception. In a nutshell, I was the perfect candidate for the an "aspie."

But luckily, I somehow made friends. Friends with whom I interacted. Friends who introduced me to alcohol (hello college). Friends who took me out to parties. Friends who gave me advice on girls. And my campus was small (400 students) with a focus on community and supporting each other which further made thigns easier.

By my senior year, I've been one of the few main guys regularly hosting hangouts and parties, started dating, and had no problem meeting new people and being sociable... while still keepign up my As and coding my geeky projects.

My point is, it took work and sometimes pushes from others to help me develop my social skills and become, well, a "normal and functinal member of the society" (whatever that even means). But I can see how many people, particularily at big (20-30k+ student) campuses can miss out on this supportive social group and instead remain in their little asocial shell, eventually giving up and excusing it as aspergers.

Of course, I am not denouncing aspergers - it's a real disorder and I know a few people who have it. Yes, copious social interaction have helped them adjust, but there's still some awkwardness and you can tell it's more of a learned "acting" than natural social intuition. Those people are constantly thinking of how to act, really struggling on the inside, and can never fully overcome the disorder; but it's different from those who merely think they have aspergers because they never even tried to overcome it.

#3Koobazaur

Posted 03 March 2013 - 01:46 PM

Honestly I believe many self-diagnosed aspergers are people going through a social-awkwardness phase. Problem is, many never get out of it.

To destroy my credibility further with more anecdotal examples, when I was a freshman at college I was the guy who avoided parties to instead sit in his room and either do homework (straigh-A over-achevier) or code his geeky game projects. I was awkward as heck and the notion of even talking to a girl was doomed to failure before its conception. In a nutshell, I was the perfect candidate for the an "aspie."

But luckily, I somehow made friends. Friends with whom I interacted. Friends who introduced me to alcohol (hello college). Friends who took me out to parties. Friends who gave me advice on girls. And my campus was small (400 students) with a focus on community and supporting each other which further made thigns easier.

By my senior year, I've been one of the few main guys regularly hosting hangouts and parties, started dating, and had no problem meeting new people and being sociable... while still keepign up my As and coding my geeky projects.

My point is, it took work and sometimes pushes from others to help me develop my social skills and become, well, a "normal and functinal member of the society" (whatever that even means). But I can see how many people, particularily at big (20-30k+ student) campuses can miss out on this supportive social group and instead remain in their little asocial shell, eventually giving up and excusing it as aspergers.

Of course, I am not denouncing aspergers - it's a real disorder and I know a few people who have it. Yes, copious social interaction have helped them adjust, but there's still some awkwardness and you can tell it's more of a learned "acting" than social intuition. Those people really struggle on the inside and can never fully overcome the disorder; but it's different from those who merely think they have aspergers because they never even tried to overcome it.

#2Koobazaur

Posted 03 March 2013 - 01:45 PM

Honestly I believe many self-diagnosed aspergers are people going through a social-awkwardness phase. Problem is, many never get out of it.

To destroy my credibility further with more anecdotal examples, when I was a freshman at college I was the guy who avoided parties to instead sit in his room and either do homework (straigh-A over-achevier) or code his geeky game projects. I was awkward as heck and the notion of even talking to a girl was doomed to failure before its conception. In a nutshell, I was the perfect candidate for the an "aspie."

But luckily, I somehow made friends. Friends with whom I interacted. Friends who introduced me to alcohol (hello college). Friends who took me out to parties. Friends who gave me advice on girls. And my campus was small (400 students) with a focus on community and supporting each other which further made thigns easier.

By my senior year, I've been one of the few main guys regularly hosting hangouts and parties, started dating, and had no problem meeting new people and being sociable... while still keepign up my As and coding my geeky projects.

My point is, it took work and sometimes pushes from others to help me develop my social skills and become, well, a "normal and functinal member of the society" (whatever that even means). But I can see how many people, particularily at big (20-30k+ peoplE) campuses can miss out on this supportive social group and instead remain in their little asocial shell, eventually exusing it as aspergers.

Of course, I am not denouncing aspergers - it's a real disorder and I know a few people who have it. Yes, copious social interaction have helped them adjust, but there's still some awkwardness and you can tell it's more of a learned "acting" than social intuition. Those people really struggle on the inside and can never fully overcome the disorder; but it's different from those who merely think they have aspergers because they never even tried to overcome it.

#1Koobazaur

Posted 03 March 2013 - 01:44 PM

Honestly I believe many self-diagnosed aspergers are people going through a social-awkwardness phase. Problem is, many never get out of it.

To destroy my credibility further with more anecdotal examples, when I was a freshman at college I was the guy who avoided parties to instead sit in his room and either do homework (straigh-A over-achevier) or code his geeky game projects. I was awkward as heck and the notion of even talking to a girl was doomed to failure before its conception. In a nutshell, I was the perfect candidate for the an "aspie."

But luckily, I developed friends. Friends with whom I interacted. Friends who introduced me to alcohol (hello college). Friends who took me out to parties. Friends who gave me advice on girls. And my campus was small (400 students) with a focus on community and supporting each other which further made thigns easier.

By my senior year, I've been one of the few main guys regularly hosting hangouts and parties, started dating, and had no problem meeting new people and being sociable... while still keepign up my As and coding my geeky projects.

My point is, it took work and sometimes pushes from others to help me develop my social skills and become, well, a "normal and functinal member of the society" (whatever that even means). But I can see how many people, particularily at big (20-30k+ peoplE) campuses can miss out on this supportive social group and instead remain in their little asocial shell, eventually exusing it as aspergers.

Of course, I am not denouncing aspergers - it's a real disorder and I know a few people who have it. Yes, copious social interaction have helped them adjust, but there's still some awkwardness and you can tell it's more of a learned "acting" than social intuition. Those people really struggle on the inside and can never fully overcome the disorder; but it's different from those who merely think they have aspergers because they never even tried to overcome it.

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