How do I find the (target) angular velocity that will rotate a ship towards a given point?
You can calculate the target angular velocity vector by taking the cross product of the current direction and the desired direction, and scaling according to the desired rotation speed. That leaves the question of the ship's roll when it reaches the destination, though - if you care about that, this problem becomes more complicated.
this is a very nice solution seems to be working well so far. As for the roll, I think it's fine to have spaceship gravitate towards an 'up' vector, or I'll just figure something out