Jump to content

  • Log In with Google      Sign In   
  • Create Account

Banner advertising on our site currently available from just $5!


1. Learn about the promo. 2. Sign up for GDNet+. 3. Set up your advert!


Bad Jokes


Old topic!
Guest, the last post of this topic is over 60 days old and at this point you may not reply in this topic. If you wish to continue this conversation start a new topic.

  • You cannot reply to this topic
231 replies to this topic

#101 Muncher   Members   -  Reputation: 100

Posted 03 October 2005 - 04:21 PM

more bad jokes....

Q. what's brown and sticky?
A. A stick


Q. whats pink and fluffy
A. pink fluff

:)

Sponsor:

#102 H_o_p_s   Members   -  Reputation: 877

Posted 03 October 2005 - 04:33 PM

What color is a cheerleader? Yeller.

Why are crocodiles brown and flat? Because if they were yellow and round, they'd be lemons.

Oh, and by the way, if you google "bad jokes" this thread is number 4…

#103 rileyriley   Members   -  Reputation: 235

Posted 03 October 2005 - 05:12 PM

A neutron walks into a bar, asks for a beer, and eats some nuts. The beer comes, but he realizes he doesn't have any money.

"Oh, man, I'm sorry, I don't have any money!" he exlaims.

The bartender smiles and says, "that's alright... for you, no charge."


----


What's a pirate's favorite kind of socks?

ARRRRgyle!

What's a pirate's favorite color?

ARRRange!

Did you hear about the new pirate movie?

It's rated ARRRR!

What's a pirate's favorite mode of transportation?

(wait)

A pirate ship, dimwit.


----

How much does corn cost at the pirate vegetable stand?

A buck an ear!


----


What do you call a pair of trigonometric pigs?

Coswine!


----


One time I had all this work to do and I didn't waste my time online

ha.

#104 Anonymous Poster_Anonymous Poster_*   Guests   -  Reputation:

Posted 04 October 2005 - 06:17 AM

Oh, and by the way, if you google "bad jokes" this thread is number 4…

its not on the 1st page....

#105 Anonymous Poster_Anonymous Poster_*   Guests   -  Reputation:

Posted 04 October 2005 - 06:20 AM

by bad jokes, he didnt mean unfunny.....

#106 H_o_p_s   Members   -  Reputation: 877

Posted 04 October 2005 - 02:05 PM

Oh wow… when I'm signed in to my google account it changes the search returns! When I log out I get a completely different set of links. How strange…

#107 Emmanuel Deloget   Members   -  Reputation: 1381

Posted 05 October 2005 - 12:22 AM

Well, since they parse your mails, they probably assume that you are a strange nerd so they promote links to nerdey sites.

That's what I'd do if I were them [wink]

#108 PaulCesar   Members   -  Reputation: 524

Posted 05 October 2005 - 01:00 AM

actualy, do you have desktop search activated perhaps?

#109 H_o_p_s   Members   -  Reputation: 877

Posted 05 October 2005 - 10:10 AM

Quote:
Original post by PaulCesar
actualy, do you have desktop search activated perhaps?
Nope, I'm a mac geek [grin] but like I said, I have a google account which impacts my searches.

#110 Calexus   Members   -  Reputation: 245

Posted 05 October 2005 - 10:44 AM

Customer: "What P?"
Support: "The P on your keyboard."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Support: "P on your keyboard."
Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"

I think I got this one in class, from one of my teachers...

#111 coderx75   Members   -  Reputation: 408

Posted 05 October 2005 - 12:46 PM

A teenager walks into a job placement agency and tells the agent at the desk that he's looking for a job.

The agent tells him that he's in luck. A job just opened up as a body guard for the daughter of a millionare. It requires that he wear a suit which will be provided, he must go on vacations with her all year around, she's a nymphomaniac and the job pays $100,000 per year.

Surprised, the teenager says, "You're bullshitting me!" The agent simply replied, "Hey, you started it."

[disturbed]

//EDIT: Changed the person to something less potentially offensive. - Kaz.

[Edited by - Kazgoroth on October 7, 2005 6:46:21 AM]

#112 crispybacon   Members   -  Reputation: 170

Posted 05 October 2005 - 01:19 PM

Q. Why do ducks have webbed feet?
A. To stamp out bush fires.

Q. Why do elephants have flat feet?
A. To stamp out flaming ducks.

Thanks Dad.

#113 Captain Nuss   Members   -  Reputation: 100

Posted 05 October 2005 - 01:38 PM

Two men stand on a scyscraper. One asks: 'Shall I push you off the roof?' The other sais: 'No.'

Q: What's white, square and lies in the grass?
A: A golf block.

#114 et1337   Members   -  Reputation: 2032

Posted 05 October 2005 - 02:02 PM

A man walked into a bar. Ow.

#115 smonahan   Members   -  Reputation: 138

Posted 05 October 2005 - 02:06 PM

Q: Why did the Roman Empire fail?



A: Because they had no way to return success.





#116 Carlos Leituga   Members   -  Reputation: 197

Posted 06 October 2005 - 02:50 PM

Making Captain Nuss joke better:

Two men stand on a scyscraper.
One asks: 'Shall I push you off the roof?'
The other sais: 'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.'
---Carlos Leituga

#117 Captain Nuss   Members   -  Reputation: 100

Posted 06 October 2005 - 03:10 PM

Quote:
Original post by Carlos Leituga
Making Captain Nuss joke better:

Two men stand on a scyscraper.
One asks: 'Shall I push you off the roof?'
The other sais: 'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.'

Hm... no, that could actually make it funny. I'll keep my original version, it suits its purpose of being an anti-joke quite well.

#118 H_o_p_s   Members   -  Reputation: 877

Posted 06 October 2005 - 05:27 PM

What's the difference between a new wife and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you!

#119 boolean   Members   -  Reputation: 1756

Posted 06 October 2005 - 07:02 PM

^^ LMAO

#120 Aliens   Members   -  Reputation: 102

Posted 06 October 2005 - 07:30 PM

Quote:
A man walked into a bar. Ow.


Did anyone not say this?

Also how did anyone miss this one.

Ok so three men are in a car driving through the desert when it suddenly breaks down. The first an electrical engineer steps out, looks around the car, and says "It must be a problem with the electrical system, maybe we should try replacing the battery". The second man a mechanical engineer steps out pops the hood fiddles with some stuff before "Saying it must be a problem with the engine, maybe we should replace some belts". The third man a Microsoft programmer steps out and says, "why dont we just try closing all the windows, shutting it down, waiting a few minutes, and starting it up again"




Old topic!
Guest, the last post of this topic is over 60 days old and at this point you may not reply in this topic. If you wish to continue this conversation start a new topic.



PARTNERS