EULAs revised

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1 comment, last by DarkAngel16 23 years, 1 month ago
I know this has been talked about alot befor but the last thread about this didn''t contain much information. I''m pretty much looking for a "Generalised" EULA template or something of such if anyone can help me out
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By clicking I agree, you agree, in a legally binding way, to the following:

1. You do not own the software. The hard earned $50 you paid just bought you an oversized cardboard box and a CD jewel case. You also own the label side of the CD. We own the shiny side, the bits, the arrangement of the bits, anything that looks like the bits, and your cat.

We are only letting you use the software because you gave us $50 for an oversized cardboard box.

Note that you don''t own the pictures on the cardboard box either, just the box


2. The software may only be used on one machine, by one person, and be seen only on one monitor by that one person. If you wish to transfer the software to another person, machine, or monitor then you must remove this software entirely and say 50 hail marys to purge your soul.

Of course since our uninstaller leaves a lot of junk in your system registry, you can''t actually remove the software in its entirety. Which means you can''t legally transfer the software and you will owe us another license and another $50 without getting an oversize cardboard box in return.

If anyone else uses this software, looks at this software, or is in the room while this software is running then they will require a license as well,and that''s another $50 thank you very much.


3. This software is provided as is. We are not responsible if it reformats your harddrive, sets your bookmarks to pay-for-porno sites, gives you an ILoveYou Virus, impregnates your dog, hands out copies of your credit reports on the street corner, or causes the End of Life on Earth.

This also waives any claim or guarantee that our software actually works in any way shape or form. You agree that the disk could have nothing but this installer program and previews for our next release, and it would be just peachy.

And it means that you are not really entitled to tech support, and should be thankful that we hired some ignorant slugs to listen to your whining about choppy framerates and no sound. No, they won''t be trained to solve your problems, but at least you can pretend that they care.


4. You further agree to waive any and all rights legal and otherwise, which might otherwise provide you protections as a consumer, including consumer protection laws, warranty laws, state laws, national laws, and influential in-laws. You agree that any dispute about this agreement or this product will be handled by the impartial decisions of my brother Fred who plays a judge on a local tv show and is coincidentally credited as the lead artist of this game.


If you click I disagree, then you will not be able to run this software, and since we''re using a lo grade windows 3.1 installer program that we found at a garage sale, it will likely crash your machine as it tries to close, leaving file fragments and registry entries all over the place.



Did I miss anything?
LOL

I love it, thanks.. I''ll just make a few changes since it''s a free-to-use internet game so it''s free but they don''t get a box

It''s a classical Server/Client setup, which I don''t want to be sued if something happens and I don''t know any lawyers

Thanks again.

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