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Critique This Piece


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#1 CRFaithMusic   Crossbones+   -  Reputation: 1042

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Posted 08 September 2013 - 05:10 AM

Hi,

 

I have just finished work on this piece and I'd love it if you could give me some feedback. Absolutely anything you notice or your opinion would be great :)

 

https://soundcloud.com/caleb-faith/twilight-dawn

 

Thanks for your time,

Caleb



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#2 Kerfuffle   Members   -  Reputation: 296

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Posted 08 September 2013 - 08:01 AM

Very Jeremy Soule-like! Love the feel of the piece, definitely reminded me of walking through Oblivion. I do feel that the main ostinato is a bit too repetitive, it could have maybe changed instruments for a bit to keep it fresh. Other than that, it sounded well produced, and was great to listen to :)



#3 Bluefarmer   Members   -  Reputation: 180

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Posted 08 September 2013 - 08:50 AM

Very nice piece. I like the subtlety and softness of some of the instruments. But I agree with Kerfuffle that the main melody could use a change of timbre sometimes since it does become repetitive. Still very nice though. 



#4 10aheadgames^RH   Members   -  Reputation: 295

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Posted 09 September 2013 - 12:07 AM

Thank God music is subjective. I loved this piece and had no problem with the ostinato; it added a tone of excitement to it.
I love it when music tells a story and gives you pictures, this one definitely did.
I don't like the word "Twilight" though, for relatively obvious reasons.

 

Keep up the good work, mate!


Rune Hansen

Developer

10ahead Games


www.10aheadgames.com


#5 CRFaithMusic   Crossbones+   -  Reputation: 1042

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Posted 09 September 2013 - 06:15 AM

Kerfuffle thats what I was aiming for :) it's actually composed in Dorian mode on A. I agree that it is a bit repetitive but I was aiming for some background music which isn't changing every second so it was what I planned for. Thanks for your input!

Bluefarmer thanks for the feedback :)

 

10aheadgames^RH thankyou! I actually never thought of that association before :/ why do bad movies ruin good names? ;) i may change it...

Thankyou everyone :)



#6 Dodopod   Members   -  Reputation: 666

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Posted 09 September 2013 - 11:38 AM

I have to agree with Kerfuffle and Bluefarmer -- the ostinato does need to be less repetitive (however contradictory that statement is). More specifically, my ears expected to hear it repeated in a lower register at some point, and/or passed back and forth between the woodwinds periodically. I would have also liked to hear it stated, in full, on strings; particularly around 1:35, instead of repeating the 0:24-0:40 section verbatim.

 

Also, the coda doesn't seem quite resolved to me, in spite of the variation in the ostinato (similar to at 0:40). I sort of feel that there should be something like this: On the final note of the flute, the cellos play an E3, then, at the end of that note, move down to A2. Lots of other things would work, my point is just that the end of the song neither sounds final, nor as though something else is about to happen.






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