As most other people seem to agree I believe you are ready for a relationship when you don't need it. Otherwise you might just end up hurting the girl (and yourself). Never go into a relationship because you feel its needed in your life. You're also more likely to find a good match for yourself when you're not noticeably desperate. So just take it easy and do the things you enjoy (hanging out with you're friends more (and trying to make more friends) isn't a bad idea though since it will make you better in social situations and eventually might help you find that dream girl)
married or unmarried development ; -9
Yes, what I really meant to say is that you have to take a break to think about yourself. Finding out what you need now. You must find the solution within yourself what you like what you don't. Start from things you are sure about.
the question is if i should take a break and ... or ... I would like to rethink my way of living
And that's why I don't suggest to bring someone in, they might make that worse. If you have good friends spend some more time with them. If you have some spare money maybe get a couple of months of gym. Maybe you are just burn out and need rest or maybe that will be more permanent change but what the really important thing is that you have to strive for change somehow.
Marrying surely diminishes on the time you can work on your game development. Have kids as well and be in charge of providing for the family and you could be down to 5%-10% of what you could do if you didn't have to care about anyone else (aka being single :) ). Or it could be just zero some days/weeks/months/years.
But that's the price. If you don't devote enough time to your partner or kids then you shouldn't have gone down that road. If you don't continue giving them you won't be able to get any joy out of having them either. Essentially the huge amount of time invested into the family is wasted if you drift apart and divorce. You will have to start building such things from scratch. Whereas a game development doesn't suffer too much if you have to suspend it for a time period.
For me having a family of my own is something invaluable and it comes first and everything else after it. Managing my time efficiently is crucial otherwise I'd have no time to do anything productive/creative such as game dev. I can always try to fit in some game dev time in between keeping the family matters in shape but the situation would be impossible other way around. Family doesn't conform to schedules, it defines them :)
I've been married for 25 years. I've been programming for 40 years. I would say the two concepts are orthogonal.
Yes, what I really meant to say is that you have to take a break to think about yourself. Finding out what you need now. You must find the solution within yourself what you like what you don't. Start from things you are sure about.
the question is if i should take a break and ... or ... I would like to rethink my way of livingAnd that's why I don't suggest to bring someone in, they might make that worse. If you have good friends spend some more time with them. If you have some spare money maybe get a couple of months of gym. Maybe you are just burn out and need rest or maybe that will be more permanent change but what the really important thing is that you have to strive for change somehow.
Actually I don't think it's useful to think too much about yourself. 25 years of thinking only taught me not to think about life and these important things (okay, I think I'm a below average thinker. When I think, only the Facebook-like bullshit thoughts I can develop, as you can see from my posts).
Anyhoo, I think it's better to actually do stuff and try stuff. For example, Fir, do you still live with your parents? If so, move.
To the "make friends" comments: for me, it would be as hard as finding a girlfriend. I enjoy company when I'm "forced" (for example in work or in school), but there were maybe 2-3 people (+ some relatives) in my life with whom I could imagine spending my free time too. Most people don't know or get it, because they know me as a friendly, social (apart for parties) and nice, even a cool guy.
So if the OP is a little bit like me, then the "make friends" comment are pretty much equal to "look for a wife".
Being married never really affected my programming. I always had the same amount of time.
Having a kid on the other hand makes it much more difficult. My wife is no longer understanding about me spending my whole day working, which is fair enough.
Being married never really affected my programming. I always had the same amount of time.
That makes me envious but also a bit scared of you. :) :(
This topic is closed to new replies.
Advertisement
Popular Topics
Advertisement