Sign in to follow this  
  • entries
    191
  • comments
    861
  • views
    116958

OH SHIT! I FORGOT ABOUT PEPSI!

Sign in to follow this  
Mithrandir

221 views

So I'm watching television. And no fewer than 5 times in one 60 minute period, did I see a commercial for a particular brand of soda.


Pepsi. Oh and another 5 for Sprite. 3 for Dr. Pepper, too. And another 3 for Diet Pepsi too, on top of the 5 for regular Pepsi. 3 for Mountain Dew.



Am I the only one left wondering... "What the hell?!"


For the life of me, I simply cannot understand the reason why companies like Pepsi insist on advertising so much. What, is the average American so dumb that he'll one day forget that Pepsi exists if he isn't reminded once every 15 minutes?

I highly doubt that anyone in this country over the age of ten doesn't know what Pepsi/Coke/Mt. Dew/Sprite/Dr. Pepper tastes like. By that age, they've probably already developed a preference too, so who the hell are you targetting?


Is this some kind of bizarre public service, reassuring coma patients that the soft drinks they loved pre-coma still exist when they wake up?

Are you targetting immigrants from Mumbatu, who don't know what soft drinks are?


When I go shopping for soda, I buy based on four considerations: price, taste, calories, and convenience. I won't buy anything that costs a lot of money, obviously, so I only buy when they're on a 40% sale or more. I also won't buy anything that tastes like dirt either, so that limits the scope a bit. I don't buy anything that has "WARNING: THIS MAKES YOU FAT" on it either, so I stick to the diet stuff now. And finally, if your product comes in a form that I find inconvenient, I don't buy it. For example, I love the taste of Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper. But it only comes in 2 Litre bottles, which are unweildly and I cannot take them to work with me. So I don't buy them. If they came in 24oz bottles, I would. But they don't. So I don't.

This is what I base my purchases on. Not because the TV told me that Mountain Dew allows me to surf with sharks, or because Mariah Carey and her gorgeous rack told me to buy Pepsi, or because two Sumo wrestlers, each flavoured lime and lemon respectively, collided and produced "Lymon" Sprite.


The saddest part, though, is that the advertising works. These companies wouldn't spend millions of dollars on these pointless wastes of time, unless bombarding the public with them showed results. That means that someone, out there, is watching a Pepsi commercial and saying "Wow, Mariah Carey is hot. I want Pepsi."





Watched Superman 4 yesterday. Wish I hadn't. The movie is so retarded, that at one point in the movie, they show astronauts in space, wearing space suits (because you can't breathe in space), and then later in the movie, Nuclear Man abducts a girl and takes her into space, then Superman slams into Nuclear Man, who drops the girl, who is now falling back towards Earth, screaming.

...

...


In another part, Nuclear Man destroys large sections of The Great Wall of China. Superman comes in and just reassembles the wall by staring at it. WTF?





I've come to the conclusion that I'm like Superman. Except I'm fat, and not Superman.
Sign in to follow this  


4 Comments


Recommended Comments

Pepsi's Evil Plan: With all that advertising on television, Pepsi has just scored seven column inches of precious write-up space in your journal. BWAAHAAAHAAHAAHAAA.

By the way, I'm also like Superman, in that I wear my underpants on the outside of my clothes.

Share this comment


Link to comment
FYI Sprite is a product of CocaCola, and Dr Pepper is a product of Cadbury, which I _believe_ is owned by Coke as well.

It's an air time war.

Share this comment


Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now