Well, if I'm your source of news, here are the last week's round-ups:
- Bush won the election by 98% of popular votes, nader got 1%, Kerry got 2 votes, and the rest went to "None of the above"
- I got to be a level 23 magician
- My boobs are growing even bigger
- The McDonalds monopoly game was proven to be a fraud
- I came to work 2 hours early this morning, by accident
- I'm lying
That's it for now. Send me more money if you want better columns.