So apparently, in the realm of shipping, 2 = 6. Normally, when you order something with 2 day express shipping, you expect to have it within 2 business days, right? Well it's going on 6 days now, and my new video card is still AWOL. Fedex's handy-dandy website says it's not even 10 miles away from me, but it's said that since 3 days ago.
FedEx 2Day Service
Feb 7, 2005 12:38 am Left FedEx Ramp CHEEKTOWAGA NY
Feb 4, 2005 4:25 pm Arrived at FedEx Ramp CHEEKTOWAGA NY
5:45 am Left FedEx Sort Facility INDIANAPOLIS IN
Feb 3, 2005 12:20 pm Arrived at Sort Facility INDIANAPOLIS IN
5:15 am Left FedEx Sort Facility LOS ANGELES CA
Feb 2, 2005 1:22 pm Left FedEx Origin Location CITY OF INDUSTRY CA
1:19 pm Left FedEx Origin Location CITY OF INDUSTRY CA
8:40 am Pickup status CITY OF INDUSTRY CA
Feb 1, 2005 5:22 pm Arrived at Sort Facility LOS ANGELES CA
Ladies and Gentlemen, Fedex has somehow learned how to bend the very laws of time and space, and due to them, 2 is now equal to 6. We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused. You'll probably need to buy new calculators and math books because of this.
I changed my name to Lord Reginald Gregory Wadsworth Charles Peppersworth the Fourteenth, Great Master and First and Principal Knight Grand Cross of the Most Honourable Order of the Asparagus.