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DrSnake

C&C on 2 of my songs please

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Hiya i would like to show 2 of my finished songs that i would like some C&C on how to improve it etc. http://www.rmmpnet.org/members/McSNK/EoW(Instrumental).mp3 http://www.rmmpnet.org/members/McSNK/TearDrops(instrumental).mp3 i like the second one the best myself ©Copyright 2005, Raynold van Heyningen

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Alright, I'll crit them as I listen.

-EoW-

I'm not feeling the piano samples. You should find some better ones. The drums arent bad. Nice overall progression in the song. Sounds a little empty at points (unless you meant this to have vocals put over it or something). Oh, wait, thats 'cause theres no bass in this. You should put bass in it (some kind). Something to fill in the low end. Overall, I think this is pretty good, but its lacking in the melody department. Its got lots of background stuff, and it would be a nice bed for a melody to sit on though.

-TearDrops-

Very nice little bit at the beginning. I'm liking the melody there. I dont know about that little orchestral hit. Also, the bass is a little too busy before the drums come in. Doesn't really help the build. This song definitely has more of a definitive melody than EoW. Again, though, this sounds like it was written to have vocals put onto it. Towards the end, when the drums cut out for a second, you should lead up to that with a fill or something. You also need to stick a bass drum under that cymbal hit. Wait, wait, you did it twice? Eh, I don't know about that. Towards the end its ending on a nice vibe, but it just cuts off. Let it fade out or actually bring it to a close, don't just cut it off. Good stuff overall.

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EoW: The piano doesn't feel right… it might be the samples, but I think that it is more that all of the notes in the chord are coming down at exactly the same time, having them just a little off (try recording you hitting the keys, and just changing the overall timing and velocities) I really like the drums in it. And again, more bass please! I thought that a melody would come out about 1/3 of the way through it, never did. I really enjoy the piece, has a nice feel to it, but I think a melody on top, more bass, and changing the piano would do it wonders.

TearDrops: I like the feel to this one, and it matches the style with EoW. Some of the synth in the middle I feel could have more texture to the actuall sound, but doesn't sound too bad. I really like the chord progression. Again a bigger more melodious line on top would put it over the top.

Overall I really enjoyed the pieces and they make really good background music (which may be the reason you avoided the melodies). Great job!

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