Untiteled Horror game
Author
Hi, before I start posting the plot I would allow anything to help out this story.
10 years have passed since the icruil war. Earth was left for the dead and dying. A devilish portal was unleashed... until one man rose up. Devastated by the loss of his familly he was driven crazy...for a good reason.
So, the basic idea is this "guy" Codenamed Tiru. Goes on this crazy mission to kill the devil.
Icruil was the war between god and the devil. God lost now the devil is reigning earth and ripping it apart. With his army of "hellish creatures" llike clowns,puppets,zombies,those overwatch guys from half-life 2,ghouls and alot of other creatures from games like Doom,Half-life,Manhunt and a bit of Halo. Am not rlly developing it yet infact am still learning but just got the idea.
So I understand that the general plot is:
1° The world changes.
2° A hero embarks on a quest to reverse the change.
3° [???]
Character building Who is Tiru? What does he look like? What is his personality? His personal history? Does he have relatives, friends, family that are still alive? Who was he before the world changed? Where did he live? How did he survive since then, and where? What were the mental consequences of the world change? Are there any other characters? Same questions for them.
History building What happened ten years ago? Where? Why? Because of who? Who knew beforehand? Did everyone know about it right away, or was it kept secret? How did nations react? How did religions react? How did atheists react? How did the scientific community react? How did the stock exchanges react? How did the media react? How did the internet react? What weapons were used by humans? Were Nukes used? What happened as telecommunications (Web, Media, Telephone) went down and only telegraph was left? What happened as the power grid disappeared? What happened as flowing water disappeared? What happened as food supplies faded? What happened to boats that were at sea during the events? What happened to isolated islands in the pacific or indian ocean? When and how did defeat become universally acknowledged?
World building Where does most of the action take place? How dangerous are infernal creatures? How do human survivors manage to survive (find food, shelters, water, medical supplies, fight off demonspawn, sleep)? Are humans wary of each other or united in their fight for life? Are there any formal government structures left, or is anarchy and/or tribal and clan partiarchy the rule? What weapons are available after 10 years? Are they used sparingly, or is new ammunition and repair available? Have new weapons been developed? What is the state of petrol-run vehicles and machinery? Are ruins of urban centers poplated, or have all humans fled to the country? What is the commoner's perspective on the life they lead? On the life they led before the change? On the danger? On the death of others? On his own death (as opposed to more gruesome torture or eternal damnation or other, more "devilish" promotional offers)? Do they know what happened and what is going on? What is the effect of malnutrition on their health ? What is the effect of the depressing situation on childbirth (how many children less than 10 years old are there)? What is the current power of religion? Of science? Of former military and statesmen? Do old country flags, anthems and mottos still have a meaning?
Cosmology building Who is the devil? Does he borrow from the Christian devil (subtle, non-violent, intervenes through sheer cleverness, knows human nature well enough to make humans damn themselves while he looks on, passively)? Or is it some kind of monster or evil spirit that delights in violence? Or does he have an agenda that involves the slaughter of millions for things other than his pleasure? Who is God? Why isn't he all-powerful and transcendent? If he created the world, why doesn't he control it? Why do people have free will (or do they)? If not, who else created the world? Is He older than the devil? How are the two linked? How and why did the Icruil war start? How was it fought, on God's side? Are there any of God's troops left on earth (if humans survived, so must have others). What makes Earth and humans so special? Or were they collateral damage in a total war that spans infinitely many planets? How des the inherent magic of fiendish and angelic beings clash with the traditional scientific outlook on things? How does that magic work (write at least a dozen sentences to decribe this very important point)?
Plot building Why did Tiru wait until now (ten years!) to start fighting the Devil (Be warned: desperation and insanity is seldom a good plot-driving event)? What resources does he have access to? Does he have a plan? What major obstacles will he encounter? What minor obstacles will he encounter? What is the breaking point in his psyche, where he will prove that he is a hero and start overcoming obstacles (in the beginning: anti-climactic, you need time to present the obstacles before he overcomes them. in the end: too "deus ex machina")? How will he overcome them? What is the moral of the story? What has he learned? Write a summary of the epilogue.
Also: work on your english. Write correct sentences, with less ellipses, less "quotes" "around" ""guy"" (unless you mean he's not a guy, or it could be doubted). And so on.
1° The world changes.
2° A hero embarks on a quest to reverse the change.
3° [???]
Also: work on your english. Write correct sentences, with less ellipses, less "quotes" "around" ""guy"" (unless you mean he's not a guy, or it could be doubted). And so on.
"With his army of "hellish creatures" llike clowns,"
COOL! :)
You ask for help so basically all I need to say is what ToohrVyk posted, it needs a lot of expanding and explaining, would be nice to know the what’s and whys.
COOL! :)
You ask for help so basically all I need to say is what ToohrVyk posted, it needs a lot of expanding and explaining, would be nice to know the what’s and whys.
Not really a comment on the story, but you're selection of enemies is a little whacky. You seem to run the gamut from possed objects(puppet) to undead(ghouls) to aliens(HL2/Halo-like things). A more coherent set of enemies might make a more believable world. Doom didn't have Martians come and attack you too, it would just take away from the whole demon-thing(unless there was a backstory of Alien vs. Demon wars or something like that).
Good luck with your game!
Good luck with your game!
Having a world in which the Devil defeated God, doesn't seem to go well with Christian theology and prophecy, if I understand it correctly. I admittedly don't know much about the subject and have never read the Bible, but it's my understanding that God is supposed to beat Satan. Maybe you should consider using a religion where there is more of a constant good vs. evil conflict (Zoroastrianism maybe, or some other ancient religions of a similar nature). Of course, the Christian theology will be more familiar to most gamers. I suppose it doesn't really matter, since it's just a game, but those are my thoughts on the issue anyway.
Interesting beginning. I recommend you make Tiru a mere simple human to make the game more challenging and therefore more fun. I also recommend to keep you story "scary" by just keeping scary characters, such as the devils, devilish puppets you mentioned but please keep aliens out. Aliens kinda don't go with the theme. Aliens go more with sci-fi themes. So its going to be scary, keep as scary as you can. You won't regret it. Your gamers won't. :-)
Hey its me again. Just on another comp. Anyway, to anwser ToohrVyks questions
#3 in the genral plot is a surprise.
And am working on all the building.
For GameArtist
I have decided to disclude aliens.
Now martiandragon to awnser your question am thinking about making up a ancient
race.
#3 in the genral plot is a surprise.
And am working on all the building.
For GameArtist
I have decided to disclude aliens.
Now martiandragon to awnser your question am thinking about making up a ancient
race.
Anonymous Poster what are you saying? I don't understand why you are not structuring your sentences clearly.
For some plot twists, perhaps Tiru went mad due to both helping create the portal once long ago and due to it losing his family, this also means he knows how it works and where it is.. But due to grief he forgot and slowly his memory comes back.. (From a crazed killer to a person on a mission of vengeance) also makes room for stuff like him intuitively knowing where to go and/or flashbacks of how an area once was..
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