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born2die

Facts about John Carmack

34 posts in this topic

Facts about John Carmack - Carmack had invented lighting technique for 3D games which is better than real sun lighting and works very fast even on Pentium-2. But he din't publish it because he likes God and do not want to publish God's incompetence in lighting techniques. - Carmack has nightvision ability because he can disable "dynamic shadows" life's option and real life has no "static shadows". - Carmack knows how to turn on real life's console and enter cheat codes in it. But he despises cheaters. - Carmack had patented "feeling of satisfaction" during shooting in the unpleasant creature from close distance from two-barreled shotgun. - Carmack had written ideal 3D-game physics engine for two days only. But later he had spended half of year to rewrite it from scratch because real physic is imperfect. - Carmack can divide by zero. - Carmack's games are based on real stories from 3010AD. - Carmack always knows which electron in the chips caused program failure. - Carmack has portal to hell in his working cabinet. - Carmack doesn't know the word "impossible". Also he hates the word "unreal". Facts about Carmack for game programmers: - Carmack debugs programs by sending binary exes to sound card. While listening the sound he determines errors in code. - Carmack doesn't like big open areas because of Z-fighting in his eyes. - Carmack doesn't like to keep doors opened because opened visible portal reduces FPS. - Carmack doesn't like to twinkle because closed eyes cause huge fillrate with poor image quality. - Carmack blames God due to God had created universe out-door, not in-door. - Some time ago Carmack was writing letter on the sheet of paper. Once he filled one side of the sheet and crossover it, it has dissapeared. Carmack had thought "shity culling...". - Carmack casts sharp shadow only. [Edited by - born2die on November 28, 2006 7:49:51 AM]
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- Carmack invented colour. Before Carmack there was only white, magenta, cyan and black.

Skizz
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John Carmack invented gravity, and to celebrate, he threw an apple at Issac Newton, smacking him right on the back of the head. It was a great shot.
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Quote:
Original post by ViLiO
John Carmack invented gravity, and to celebrate, he threw an apple at Issac Newton, smacking him right on the back of the head. It was a great shot.

BOOM HEADSHOT!
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Carmack doesn't use a keyboard, he just creates brainwave patterns that resonant with the CPU to make the appropriate input signals.

Skizz
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Quote:
Original post by born2die
- Carmack can divide by zero.


Holy crap! I want a fanboy t-shirt with that slogan on it! [smile]
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Carmack doesnt use a monitor, he just ripped out his eyeballs and plugged his optic nerves directly into the video out sockets.
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Original post by grekster
Carmack doesnt use a monitor, he just ripped out his eyeballs and plugged his optic nerves directly into the video out sockets.


Carmack now leaves a hell of a mess when he goes the toilet.
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When Carmack moves, Chuck Norris lifts his left eyebrow.
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A fictional conversation between John Carmack and the ambassador of another planet:

Ambassador: Greetings earthling. We come in peace. What is it that you do on your planet?

Carmack: I make computer games where you run around and kill aliens.
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In the early development of Doom 3, John Carmack was forced to fabricate and engineer the first Brain-to-AGP adapter for himself so he could run the Alpha in full graphics with a decent framerate.
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Carmack isn't pleased with the fill-rate and poly counts in real life, so he is writing his own drivers.
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John Carmack puked when Gears of War came out. The only thing he could say after that was, "There are no 'gears' in war. Just a bunch of guns and aliens in a small indoor scene." Aparently, he also believes that even though the game has quaked most of the gaming community, it's destined to an early doom because of the extensive ammount of outdoor scenes.
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Quote:
Original post by born2die
- Carmack's games are based on real stories from 3010AD.


Prove him wrong, I dares ya!

Quote:
Original post by born2die
- Carmack has portal to hell in his working cabinet.


He has hordes of demonic fanboys in his cabinet?


EDIT: Why am I posting here on Christmas eve instead of letting this thread die the horrible death it deserves?
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Original post by spartanx
Quote:
Original post by born2die
- Carmack can divide by zero.


Holy crap! I want a fanboy t-shirt with that slogan on it! [smile]


That actually sounds like a good idea
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