# Help review my game setting

This topic is 2825 days old which is more than the 365 day threshold we allow for new replies. Please post a new topic.

## Recommended Posts

Hi Gamedev. I cooked up this setting during pre-production of my post-apocalyptic CRPG, and would like your constructive criticism. Please let me know of your thoughts about it, thanks!

Quote:

Attached an image of a rebel soldier and a Combine soldier here, both unmasked.

Combine soldier.

A soldier in the rebel forces.

[Edited by - ruben tan on July 12, 2010 2:38:08 PM]

##### Share on other sites
Re:

When you say that the game is CRPG, what does the player actually do in the game?

##### Share on other sites
Quote:
 Original post by WaiRe:When you say that the game is CRPG, what does the player actually do in the game?

The player starts off a silent little town, goes out on a solo hunt, and then comes back to find his village massacred by raiders. He sets out to the wildlands alone, but barely hours beyond his village he is captured by slavers and sold to a nearby city as a slave. End tutorial (and skippable).

Flashfoward to 3 years later, where the PC had been pretty much locked up in the pens all these years without an interested buyer. Unsold slaves are useless, and thus as a last ditch effort to make some money out of them, the PC is shoved into the underground arena and made to fight for the entertainment of the crowd. The first battle ends in questionable circumstances - regardless of whether the PC wins or loses the fight, the opponent dies of cardiac arrest. Before questions could be asked though, the entire city comes under the siege of an army, blasting the path to freedom open for the PC.

Seeing his chance for freedom, he escapes into the wildlands. Having nowhere to go, he remembered a tale told to him by his war veteran surrogate grandfather of a beautiful city to the far south. A prosperous city free of slavery, strife and suffering. A utopia in the middle of the desolate wildland, free from the constant threats of nature's deadly beasts.

Having nowhere else to go, the PC sets out on a journey to find that city, and leave this hell hole behind once and for all.

That's the storyline for the first game.

This is an old-school-like RPG along the veins of Fallout, Darksun and Eschalon. You control one single party member (with recruitable NPCs along the way), explore the lands, meeting new people and interesting locales, etc.

- Combat will be turn-based
- Multiple solutions to ALL quests
- Branching and mutually exclusive plot lines
- No trivial quests like fedex quests, kill x number of y, etc
- No good/evil solutions, only choices that has morally gray consequences
- Isometric 2.5D engine with 2D tiled background and 3D characters
- 2D normal map per-pixel lighting and shadow maps

[Edited by - ruben tan on September 21, 2010 7:30:59 PM]

##### Share on other sites
What do you think you need?
What do you do next?

##### Share on other sites
To think of it as player,i believe the storyline for a RPG isnt so important.(It IS important,but not that much!).If i were you,i would think of different solutions to every level.The thing that makes a RPG interesting is the variety of choices that you can make in it and different consequences that every choice has.

You must cook up a setting for these:

No good/evil solutions, only choices that has morally gray consequences
Multiple solutions to ALL quests
Branching and mutually exclusive plot lines

Because just mentioning them is something,performing them properly is something else.

##### Share on other sites
@Wai

I needed input on the game setting. On whether is it too far fetched, too cliche, etc.

I'm going to lock down the setting soon and then update my design document before sending it to a contract artist to get a quotation, so this is my final revision.

@kasra5004

Cut and paste from my design document:

Quote:

##### Share on other sites
Well,the level plot is really nice.If the rest of the levels are with this quality,ill say youve got quite a game!

So, i just talk about the main storyline.The story is kinda cliche,but thats something that you can say about every post-apocalyptic game!The details are good and new.But im afraid there are too many small points,especially names in it.(maybe you wanted your document to be as complete as possible and you want to cut some parts in the final version.)But its really hard to fit this great deal of information in a single of game without boring and confusing the player with long cutscenes and notes.( In a part, you mentioned "the first game",so, maybe you want to explain the past gradually in several episodes.I dont know.)

But anyway, keep in mind that the story must be told in small parts.It cant be told at once,its not like a book.So i really think that its better that you omit some unnecessary names and details in the final version of the story. Like the names of some tribes that disappeared after a short time or names like "Great Desertion".what im saying is,it would be really disappointing when a player hears the name "Crissen Order" for the second time and ask himself: what was that one?

But in general, well done.

##### Share on other sites
Quote:
 Original post by kasra5004Well,the level plot is really nice.If the rest of the levels are with this quality,ill say youve got quite a game!So, i just talk about the main storyline.The story is kinda cliche,but thats something that you can say about every post-apocalyptic game!The details are good and new.But im afraid there are too many small points,especially names in it.(maybe you wanted your document to be as complete as possible and you want to cut some parts in the final version.)But its really hard to fit this great deal of information in a single of game without boring and confusing the player with long cutscenes and notes.( In a part, you mentioned "the first game",so, maybe you want to explain the past gradually in several episodes.I dont know.)But anyway, keep in mind that the story must be told in small parts.It cant be told at once,its not like a book.So i really think that its better that you omit some unnecessary names and details in the final version of the story. Like the names of some tribes that disappeared after a short time or names like "Great Desertion".what i`m saying is,it would be really disappointing when a player hears the name "Crissen Order" for the second time and ask himself: what was that one?But in general, well done.

Thanks for the compliment. Generally, the design philosophy behind the delivery of the game backstory is that I only give if the player asks for it, and even so, always in small and easy to remember portions.

I haven't decided on this idea, but right now my approach is this: At the beginning of the game, the player should only know these facts:

1) The world ended because the world leaders left
2) The world leaders left because they knew a plague is about to hit earth

That's all. The rest is hidden from the player, because there's a dark age between the apocalypse event and the game's current timeline. Much of history is lost in this period, and everybody would have their own "speculations" of history. History after all, are written by the victors. Over the course of the game the player will stumble across various pre-desertion artifacts and relics, thus unlocking more of the world's history. At the same time, there are multiple versions of it, and if the player so wishes, he can embark on a completely optional sidequest to find the "ultimate truth", which I plan to make it the hardest and most obscure quest ever in the entire series.

The key to successful delivery of important names in the game world is repetition, in my opinoin. "Crissen Order" isn't important, but "Great Desertion" is. So is "Pre-Desertion", which is used similarly as the term "Pre-Apocalypse". Everybody would talk about it all the time in the game, and even treat it as vile curses (e.g. calling somebody a "deserter" is an extremely offensive term, even more so than outright calling somebody a "traitor"), which ties into the culture of the setting itself.

##### Share on other sites
Re: ruben tan
Quote:
 I needed input on the game setting. On whether is it too far fetched, too cliche, etc.

I don't have a system to tell whether a game setting is too far fetched or cliche. I don't think this is an important evaluation, because if your game has value to the player, the player is going to forgive the holes of the story.

I suppose a story is too far fetched when it has soring plot holes. What are the signs when a story is too far fetched?

Unsupported Surprise

This is an event that is presented as a surprise, but the entities in the world have no reason to be so. In your story, you mentioned that one day all the world leaders fled to space in 7 massive spaceships. For this to be a surprise, it is implied somehow the people do not know that it could happen. Since the spaceships are massive, it violates common sense that the people don't know about them in advance. As they are constructed the people would assume that they are for some purpose. If they know about the ships, then it wouldn't be that much of a surprise.

Technology Gap

If the governments can create and hide massive spaceships, the people probably has the technology to create medium or small spaceships. That technology should already exist. When the Eden ships leave, you would expect many more people are capable of leaving in smaller ships, but there is no mention of such event, and the option to leave is never mentioned again.

Discrepancy In Cooperation

In the story, the world leaders leave in peace among themselves but the world immediately turns chaotic. I think that if the leaders are capable to abandoning civilization like this, they must also be capable of killing each other on the Eden ships. And each of them will know that their fellow passengers are capable of doing so.

Resilience

If most people are killed by the virus and the South East Asia welcomes those affected, it is impiled that somehow those people, their plants and animals are immune to the virus. Why don't they start breeding the livestock and planting elsewhere? If there is no completition, wouldn't they thrive like weeds? Why are they stuck in SEA? If the lifeforms there are not immune, why isn't SEA also wiped out once the infected arrives? Why don't the leaders left in Eden ship return?

##### Share on other sites
Quote:
 Original post by WaiUnsupported SurpriseThis is an event that is presented as a surprise, but the entities in the world have no reason to be so. In your story, you mentioned that one day all the world leaders fled to space in 7 massive spaceships. For this to be a surprise, it is implied somehow the people do not know that it could happen. Since the spaceships are massive, it violates common sense that the people don't know about them in advance. As they are constructed the people would assume that they are for some purpose. If they know about the ships, then it wouldn't be that much of a surprise.

I omitted a lot of details on this part. My mistake.

The "Eden Project" was initially started off as a collaboration between the world's seven continents to build massive self-contained space voyagers. At that time of its construction, it is tauted as the most expensive project ever in history. It is not concealed at all.

The key here is misdirection. The world leaders planned in secret the exact sequence of the exodus. First, china and russia would stage a massive military confrontation to take the attention away from the project. With world war 3 looming over the horizons, I don't think it's hard to envision it.

Unfortunately, if that's not logical enough, I don't have a better explanation. Deus Ex Machina maybe?

Quote:
 Original post by WaiTechnology GapIf the governments can create and hide massive spaceships, the people probably has the technology to create medium or small spaceships. That technology should already exist. When the Eden ships leave, you would expect many more people are capable of leaving in smaller ships, but there is no mention of such event, and the option to leave is never mentioned again.

Eden ships are built in space, and the leaders would have to board smaller rocket shuttles to reach the ships.

The whole idea of the exodus is that it was such an orchestrated move in such an epic scale that it leaves zero room for debate on the true reason of the desertion. To pull this move off in complete secrecy can only mean one thing - that the leaders had foresaw the coming of the plague and had "deserted" the world population, abandoning them to their own devices.

Quote:
 Original post by WaiDiscrepancy In CooperationIn the story, the world leaders leave in peace among themselves but the world immediately turns chaotic. I think that if the leaders are capable to abandoning civilization like this, they must also be capable of killing each other on the Eden ships. And each of them will know that their fellow passengers are capable of doing so.

No they don't live in peace. Eventually they'll split into two groups and...

Suffice to say, many of those who boarded the ship do not know of the true reason of the project. There will be protests and bloody confrontations in these ships, but that's not really related to the central story itself.

Quote:
 Original post by WaiResilienceIf most people are killed by the virus and the South East Asia welcomes those affected, it is impiled that somehow those people, their plants and animals are immune to the virus. Why don't they start breeding the livestock and planting elsewhere? If there is no completition, wouldn't they thrive like weeds? Why are they stuck in SEA? If the lifeforms there are not immune, why isn't SEA also wiped out once the infected arrives? Why don't the leaders left in Eden ship return?

It's not that these people, plants and animals in SEA are immune. It's just that "miraculously" the continent is spared from the plague (the virus is not airborne). The real reason of this is part of the storyline of the game - along the course of the game the player will realize that there're no miracles in this world. Everything happens for a reason.

They are stuck in SEA because the rest of the lands are tainted by the virus. Think of it as this way - these viruses are incredibly aggressive (killing living beings through accelerated necrosis affecting both plants and animals) but have a very short lifespan, which prevents them from spreading too far away from the intended target.

So if these viruses would have burnt itself out in a matter of days, why did these survivors had to make the journey towards SEA? Why not wait until the virus is gone and then start life anew? Two reasons: (1) They don't know the virus have a short life and (2) the virus left them with zero natural resources: all plants, wild animals and lifestock are consumed.

1. 1
2. 2
3. 3
4. 4
Rutin
18
5. 5

• 12
• 9
• 12
• 37
• 12
• ### Forum Statistics

• Total Topics
631415
• Total Posts
2999964
×