Game programming vs Girls
don't wait too long to tell her, and don't be afraid of getting rejected. that happens to everybody :-)
Read David DeAngelo's Double Your Dating, and everything else you can get your hands on by him. I read it at about your age and it changed my life.
Damn, Thanks guys , I know problem is by my side but i wanted to know what you guys did when you were at this problem. Anyways, I just talked with her, Ironically we're just friends, She doesn't know that i have a crush on her, Well soon i'd be telling that to her.( I hope so )
P.S My hormones are raging.
Just a tip but why don't you ask her out instead? It's a lot less awkward and it achieves essentially the same goal. Moreover, you can make the date as casual as you like which puts a lot less pressure on both of you than telling her about your feelings before you even went on a first date! And think about it from her perspective, if you confess your "love" out of the blues, what is she supposed to respond?
Anyway, my advice is to try and go out with this girl as soon as possible so that you can gauge if there is any mutual attraction. So, just ask her out! It's really not worth your time obsessing about a girl if it's not meant to be anyway.
I've been there too. My advice is to not spend a huge amount of time mooning over her, regardless of anything else. Time spent daydreaming about her is time not spent talking to her (or doing anything else, in your case). Don't sit on your heels and wait for an imaginary perfect chance to make your move-- a chance will come from your own efforts or else likely not at all.
And as strong as your feelings are, there will absolutely be other girls. If she's into you, great, enjoy the relationship for as long as it lasts. If not, you won't have gained anything from letting her occupy your mind anyhow. But your hormones aren't going to be soothed by daydreams. Not to mention that I think the daydreaming makes the actual interactions more stilted and less fun all on its own.
And keep programming, it's no fun to have a crush totally take over your life, especially if it doesn't pan out. It's crude to say, but spending ten minutes on your own in the bathroom with a box of tissues (and some lit candles for ambience) should buy you an hour or two's worth of focus for other, non-hormonal pursuits.
And as strong as your feelings are, there will absolutely be other girls. If she's into you, great, enjoy the relationship for as long as it lasts. If not, you won't have gained anything from letting her occupy your mind anyhow. But your hormones aren't going to be soothed by daydreams. Not to mention that I think the daydreaming makes the actual interactions more stilted and less fun all on its own.
And keep programming, it's no fun to have a crush totally take over your life, especially if it doesn't pan out. It's crude to say, but spending ten minutes on your own in the bathroom with a box of tissues (and some lit candles for ambience) should buy you an hour or two's worth of focus for other, non-hormonal pursuits.
As per above, there is no such thing, so no point in waiting around -- ask.
The quicker the better, otherwise you risk nerves getting the better of you.
You - "Hey, I'm bored as balls, do you want to go bowling/[insert activity that everybody likes that is not going to the movies]"
Her - "OMG I LOVE BOWLING"
@ bowling in no specific order
1.
You - "BRB going to the bathroom"
-Go to bathroom-
You - "Did you miss me?"
2.
Her - "Can you help me [something she needs help with]" or "We should [do some activity... any activity]"
You - "Slow down! buy me a drink first" or "As long as you promise we can cuddle after... I'm not just a piece of meat." or "Are you trying to take advantage of me?"
You get the idea. The point is it's pretty simple to express interest without making it awkward. Once you start saying little things like the above she'll start viewing you as someone who's interested in her, but she won't think you are desperately pining for her because they are still lighthearted jokes. It's almost the same concept as "negging" a girl except you don't have to be an asshole. You show you are interested without showing you are desperate.
Worst case scenario you are no a friend that makes some pervy jokes, not that creepy guy who desperately wants her regardless of how true the latter might be.
Her - "OMG I LOVE BOWLING
"@ bowling in no specific order
1.
You - "BRB going to the bathroom"
-Go to bathroom-
You - "Did you miss me?"
2.
Her - "Can you help me [something she needs help with]" or "We should [do some activity... any activity]"
You - "Slow down! buy me a drink first" or "As long as you promise we can cuddle after... I'm not just a piece of meat." or "Are you trying to take advantage of me?"
You get the idea. The point is it's pretty simple to express interest without making it awkward. Once you start saying little things like the above she'll start viewing you as someone who's interested in her, but she won't think you are desperately pining for her because they are still lighthearted jokes. It's almost the same concept as "negging" a girl except you don't have to be an asshole. You show you are interested without showing you are desperate.
Worst case scenario you are no a friend that makes some pervy jokes, not that creepy guy who desperately wants her regardless of how true the latter might be.
As everyone stated, ask her and get it over with. Hope it works out. If all else fails, there are a million other girls in the world. So no stress really.
Only advice I have to offer... if you ask a woman out, make sure to use the word "date". Don't assume that it's implied. If she asks if it's ok to bring someone, it's probably not going to be a date. Say something like, "Actually, I was thinking just you and me, like a date." If she insists on a chaperone, that's not a bad thing (safety first) but you do want to make sure it doesn't become like just a bunch of friends hanging out.
Dude, you shouldn't be in love yet. It should be much harder for a girl to win your love. She won't respect or value your love if it is that easy to get.
Back when I was a strapping young youth I would mistake my being horny for love. Girls who had rather obnoxious and immature personalities suddenly seemed like "angels" to me (but only one at a time.... there could only be one "perfect being"). Certain activities or topics which held no genuine interest for me were suddenly fascinating simply because she liked them.
It took me a long time to realize that I was misinterpreting what I really wanted: to sexually devour them. Along with discovering this, I noticed that there were girls I wanted to do this with EVERYWHERE. All over the place.
Love and relationship are something different. They're slower, take time, and in many ways are much more of a practical matter. Do you genuinely enjoy her other interests? (you don't just think they're interesting just because her hotness likes them, do you?) Do you really like talking with her? (as in: you really enjoy the conversations, not just the fact that it's coming from her body.... Here's a good test: would you still enjoy the conversation if she were some 80 year old woman?)
It takes time and experience. At first, finding a girl attractive will distort your interpretation of everything else related to her (and even not related to her, such as programming). Good luck!
Back when I was a strapping young youth I would mistake my being horny for love. Girls who had rather obnoxious and immature personalities suddenly seemed like "angels" to me (but only one at a time.... there could only be one "perfect being"). Certain activities or topics which held no genuine interest for me were suddenly fascinating simply because she liked them.
It took me a long time to realize that I was misinterpreting what I really wanted: to sexually devour them. Along with discovering this, I noticed that there were girls I wanted to do this with EVERYWHERE. All over the place.
Love and relationship are something different. They're slower, take time, and in many ways are much more of a practical matter. Do you genuinely enjoy her other interests? (you don't just think they're interesting just because her hotness likes them, do you?) Do you really like talking with her? (as in: you really enjoy the conversations, not just the fact that it's coming from her body.... Here's a good test: would you still enjoy the conversation if she were some 80 year old woman?)
It takes time and experience. At first, finding a girl attractive will distort your interpretation of everything else related to her (and even not related to her, such as programming). Good luck!
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