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This is just showing my train of thought of a possible story idea for my concept. The post is here:

http://www.gamedev.net/topic/650644-the-idea-of-mixing-jrpg-and-western-rpgs-into-one-game/

I'd appreicate any replies, advice or any changes i should make to the idea as it'll help me out ALOT right now!

Straight to the point: You're trying to fight this corrupt government.

3. To show a government's corruption would normally require being in the country of that government to see first-hand what bad things the government is doing. Banishment is sort of the opposite. Though, it could be interesting if the set-up were a colony on an alien planet, where the colony was trying to keep tyrannical control over its population and banishing unwanted people into the alien wilderness where they would presumably die. Perhaps banished people would be made temporarily sterile in some way that only an antidote or machine found inside the colony could reverse, so there would be no possibility of surviving banish-ees starting a competing colony. Or more likely, all the citizens of the colony would be unable to reproduce except when specifically allowed by the government as a reward. Reproduction control is certainly a modern political issue.

So doing something like banishment would only work if it's in an alien colony like how you described? o _ o?

Any storyline's you think i should consider doing or should i go back and rethink? lol

What I'm saying is banishment could work for a bunch of things but possibly not a corrupt government. The reason I think the colony on an alien world might squeak by is there is so much pressure from multiple directions to sneak back into the place they have been banished from instead of just living somewhere else or coming back with an army (turning the corrupt government internal problem into a standard war vs. immoral bad guys external problem). It's not the only way you could channel a banished character into sneaking back into the country they were banished from or lurking on its borders, just an interesting way to do so and an interesting setting that sprang to mind.

I see you just like aliens haha :3

I've of course got lots of stories I'd like to see done in an interactive story+sandbox game, but they're not similar to what you've got here, maybe they wouldn't be your style at all. I'm a woman who grew up in the 80s, and a lot of entertainment produced since the 90s on is too "darker and edgier" for me. I like relatively cheerful stories which have a mix of adventure, comedy, romance, mystery, sensawonda, and just a small amount of angst and uncertainty so it's not too fluffy. I like low fantasy non-earth worlds, sci-fi-historical worlds where aliens replace humans in a low tech setting, and star-trek-esque futuristic worlds, preferably not involving Earth as a setting. (Low fantasy means the opposite of high fantasy - no elves or assasins or prophecies and dark lords and epic wars and that kind of crap. Instead magic as a natural force which is used in some of the same ways steam power or electricity or machinery could be used, plus a variety of medical and artistic uses.)

To be honest, most of my dark-edgy type stuff have become too complicated or boring EVEN TO ME haha and i'm not against cheerful stories with so much emotion like comedy and romance etc. so i'll try it Now it's my turn to introduce myself. I'm a college student in london (College is different than in US where college for us starts at 16+ just to avoid any age misunderstandings) and i'm studying games and animation ( so you see why i'm so into what i post haha ) and it's true about what they say, the dark-edgy stuff is interesting but too dark and edgy and my teacher always encourages us to make him laugh or cry ( to push us to create emotional things ) and it kinda relates to games. If a game can make me laugh or cry i'm automatically attached to that game ( I also love watching comedy, comedy in games and being comedic) so doing something opposite from dark might make it easier on me. OBVIOUSLY NOT MAKING IT FEEL LIKE A FLUFFY, SUGAR AND CANDY STUFFED GAME. But an adventure worth going on.

This is a pattern I like for an interactive story game:
1. For the initial incident, either:
-----A. Present the main character as an almost-adult who has a tutorial challenge to pass which will allow them to set off on an adventure (e.g. pokemon journey, hogwarts letter, exam to be accepted to space academy, ninja exam, mage exam, native american-esque vision quest aka survival test, etc.)
-----B. Present the main character as an unremarkable person who suddenly has something baffling happen to them (e.g. turn into a werewolf, fall through a door into another world, get abducted by aliens (preferably attractive ones), get marooned on an uninhabited island and/or alien planet, etc.)

2. After the first challenge: (do both of these, but one first, then the other as a change-up to prevent boredom)
-----A. Present two or three factions with different philosophies, and have the player choose one and start working their way up within the faction by doing quests; introduce some potential love interests in there too.
-----B. Present a clue about the world's big mystery and what the player's purpose there might be; for tasks have the character focus on survivalism goals like gathering food, building a house, and more related to the plot, training their special power(s).

3. Develop someone for the main character to struggle against: either someone from an opposing faction, or an uncooperative assigned partner, or an egotistical rival. Since it's an interactive story you could have all three, but encourage the player to focus on one at a time.

4. A dungeon filled with puzzles and loot might be nice at this point.

5.+ Now you're about 1/4 of the way in to your average RPG, and you want to alternate socializing/questing sections with dungeon/puzzle sections and a steady doling-out of clues and new/better powers and a recurring irritating enemy until you get near the climax.

(N-2). The climactic struggle should depend on the choices the player has made in the game. So there will be an array of specific pre-created possibilities for the big bad guy and the thematic issue they represent. Somewhere around 8 options. The player has to complete some kind of preparation sequence to unlock the confrontation.

(N-1) Climactic battle, emotional resolution.

(N). New game plus - the player gets to restart, retaining some advantages, or can continue playing with the world's sandbox elements as the hero or new dark lord or etc, accompanied by any love interest(s) they have won.

This actually sounds good as a structure. Of course changing some things up so it doesn't feel like a cliched story-line and game, some points i actually liked and would love to make as my base and just adapt off from it. As if i follow your likes and dislikes dead on i'd basically be making a game fit just for YOU! haha but yeah, this feels as though i could work from this a little and just change the bits that fit and don't fit in the story i'm going for. If that all makes sense x _ x

EDIT: I'm going for a low-fantasy setting but subtly putting it there where i see fit.

The story could be a whole lot more interesting if you had a more tangible antagonist than "the government". It seems very cold and faceless even to the extent that you can't really build any negative feelings towards it.

If you count the occurrence of the words "government" and "law" you can understand why I feel there is perhaps too much politics going on. The character is a soldier, there's a subtext of war and monsters so why do we care for bureaucracy and formalities? Even though it's story game this makes the player want to bash X to skip to the action, doesn't it?

But I see this more of you setting the framework for your story that perhaps later takes a more personal point of view for conveying instead of just having the narrator dictate some events that took place. Once you've established your setting we are likely to hear more about your characters and how they relate to the whole which is maybe the interesting part.

Good! I tried to make it flexible without making it so vague it was useless, but since I wrote it by definition it is slanted according to my ideas and opinions; please do modify and personalize it to create something you like. I have no objection to bits being discarded, added, substituted, rearranged, etc. And that goes for any of the suggestions I make in my posts, tutorials, or critique.

I'm going to try and design something less ambitious so i don't complicate anything. If i take banishment into a lighter context, it'd be evacuation right? Which would give me the first bit of the character's story ( Initial incident B most likely )

The story could be a whole lot more interesting if you had a more tangible antagonist than "the government". It seems very cold and faceless even to the extent that you can't really build any negative feelings towards it.

If you count the occurrence of the words "government" and "law" you can understand why I feel there is perhaps too much politics going on. The character is a soldier, there's a subtext of war and monsters so why do we care for bureaucracy and formalities? Even though it's story game this makes the player want to bash X to skip to the action, doesn't it?

Looking at the word 'tangible'. The antagonist would need to be easily contacted or recognized. And taking out all the political things, i'd be left with war and monsters. Seeing that my character would be a soldier, do you think it'll be easier to make the antagonist the actual general or leader? Although i'm pretty skeptical about going down a War path I'd feel more better just taking war out altogether lol

But I see this more of you setting the framework for your story that perhaps later takes a more personal point of view for conveying instead of just having the narrator dictate some events that took place. Once you've established your setting we are likely to hear more about your characters and how they relate to the whole which is maybe the interesting part.

It actually was just me writing down some sort of story and seeing if it could fit :) And i'm in love with the ''whole characters relating to what's going on'' thing as i actually would like to have it as a main emotional core. For example, why you'd want to sit down and actually watch a cutscene or read a piece of dialogue.