I aspire to develop games one day, and often write down ideas for game concepts I have. These aren't full design documents, and I'm not even sure they're full concept documents, if that's even a thing, but they've gotten more detailed overtime. This is the most recent one I wrote.

I want critique on the document and the concept itself.

I'm honestly not sure what the document should look like.

For the game, I basically want to know if it sounds interesting/fun.

Thanks.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Ifjy7B1ylUPljtYrjwnLRWg9JaLrlBDHVC9H74fIFTc/edit?usp=sharing

You may want to make your concept file(s) available for everyone to view; at the moment it is requiring any person wanting to look at it to request individual access.

Same here, it's asking for permission to view

Sorry, it should be open now.

1 hour ago, Tom Sloper said:

I have an outline at http://www.sloperama.com/advice/specs.htm, with links to some example GDDs at the bottom. And I have another article about how to write different game design documents (2-pagers, treatments, and full GDDs) at http://www.sloperama.com/advice/lesson13.htm.

For starters, your document should have a title (if it's really "Project Number Seven," that's fine), a brief byline that says it's a game concept for [the platform you are designing for], and a copyright notice. Your section on characters lists 2 characters. Are they both playable characters? Is one of them an NPC? Is there no antagonist? 

You describe the story as if the game is linear, with no branching player choices. 

You describe the controls as if you're speaking to a player, not a developer. Tell the reader how to make the controls work (don't tell the reader what the controls do). 

Those were informative thank you.

The story is meant to be linear. The story is mostly out of the player's hands, like in Uncharted or Final Fantasy.

On 10/24/2017 at 9:23 PM, Tom Sloper said:

I have an outline at http://www.sloperama.com/advice/specs.htm, with links to some example GDDs at the bottom. And I have another article about how to write different game design documents (2-pagers, treatments, and full GDDs) at http://www.sloperama.com/advice/lesson13.htm.

For starters, your document should have a title (if it's really "Project Number Seven," that's fine), a brief byline that says it's a game concept for [the platform you are designing for], and a copyright notice. Your section on characters lists 2 characters. Are they both playable characters? Is one of them an NPC? Is there no antagonist? 

You describe the story as if the game is linear, with no branching player choices. 

You describe the controls as if you're speaking to a player, not a developer. Tell the reader how to make the controls work (don't tell the reader what the controls do). 

Those were informative thank you.

The story is meant to be linear. The story is mostly out of the player's hands, like in Uncharted or Final Fantasy.

Does it look better now?

"A third person fast-paced action-adventure game. Movement is done through running, jumping, and the game’s dashing system. The player can also sprint and crouch."

This sentence is really confusing to me. You can run and dash, but also sprint? Could you explain the dashing system? Does your character constantly run and is that what makes it fast-paced? Sorry I don't mean to bash your work I just need some clarification.

2 hours ago, Novadude987 said:

"A third person fast-paced action-adventure game. Movement is done through running, jumping, and the game’s dashing system. The player can also sprint and crouch."

This sentence is really confusing to me. You can run and dash, but also sprint? Could you explain the dashing system? Does your character constantly run and is that what makes it fast-paced? Sorry I don't mean to bash your work I just need some clarification.

 

No problem, now that you mention it I see how that could be confusing. Dashing is explained in the next paragraph, but it's a little vague so I'll clarify. Dashing is sort of like teleporting, and you have less control over it than running or sprinting. Basically, in terms of speed. Running < Sprinting < Dashing. But dashing is the most restricted.