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About dsgus

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  1. dsgus

    Want to gain sevap points??

    @GeneralJist Wow, thanks for the amazing and detailed response again, I couldn't ask for more Read the whole thing and I see lots of good advices and things to be taken note of, will be checking the links and other things you've provided soon enough (as soon as Kurban ends ) Yet I've only started this topic 2 days ago, I feel way better, especially seeing the impacts of being freed from my burden (a.k.a. Paladins). Posting here was one of them too. The time I sit at the computer has drastically decreased (considering it was basically 24 hrs - sleep) and I've been using that time to work on these beginner C++ projects to recall what I've learned. I'm faithful of finally doing what I should have been doing so far
  2. dsgus

    Want to gain sevap points??

    Thanks for the lovely response. Also please let me know if there's another way to reply other than quoting the whole thing... A friend of mine who's been doing pretty well since I've met him, and now has graduated, told me that he wasn't so good at first either, but he found himself some teammates from school, and they did all of their studies projects (either for school or independantly, and including classes like maths) together, and it really helped his motivation and overall performance. I think that's a great idea too. Yet my 2 closest friends from school are so lazy and doesn't care much about these stuff, one of em doesn't even think of actually ending up as a sofware engineer. I've tried to befriend a few succesful people, but they're quite ahead of me and one of them is telling me to start developing an android app together right away like I could do that ๐Ÿ˜‘ I might consider finding some freshman friends or something but I'm not such an outgoing person irl and having 2 years in between might be an issue regarding classes maybe. Do you have any suggestions for finding such people to work with? Can you give any advice to hunt these people at school or do you know any online platforms or communities for finding such teammates maybe? I'd like to hear. Yeah I do that sometimes, not exactly as you've described it but I think of what makes a game good or what could be done better here and there. I also have some notes for a few game ideas. They're not too technically written (with diagrams and stuff as you said) but good enough to describe all the general and specific things I have in mind . Though all of them are AAA games ๐Ÿ˜‚ I'm really unfamiliar with modding except for installing a couple for the Sims 4 this year ๐Ÿ˜‚ My mindset is about training and improving myself and putting building blocks to eventually become a AAA game dev. Like I would refuse to learn Java cause I need C++ or C# to write a game. I know it's an awful way of thinking and not realistic. I'm trying to end my idea of "learning multiple things will prevent me to ever expertise this one thing" tho. Now that I think of it, modding sounds interesting and fun, not sure how it works and if it will help me as the way I think but it's worth to checking out imo. Again, would be glad to hear more about this from you Regarding my depression, I took psychological and psychiatric help for about 1.5-2 years from the beginning of uni for these and some other issues though they didn't really work and I wasn't taking my pills properly etc. And since my family is paying a lot for my school and getting such help is really damn expensive and not working, I cut it. But such issues actually escalated in these last 2 years especially as my academic life went extremely downhill. I think if I can get myself to achieve things in life and develop as a programmer and all, I will overcome these with ease. Doing the absolute nothing irl but achieving a lot in games isn't any helpful obviously ๐Ÿ˜‚
  3. dsgus

    Want to gain sevap points??

    Actually my freshman year was a bliss. We had the "Indroduction to programming 1&2 (1 being fall semester with C and 2 being spring semester with C++)" the rest was common stuff like maths, chemistry, history etc (for fresman and sophomore years there are like 18 commmon classes and 6 software classes, at junior year we actually fully focus on our field). I had fun learning C and C++, I spent time to study them at home, tried making custom little stuff... and for the C++ part, we had to do a custom project. I paired up with my current homemate and he didn't even touch the project so I had to do it all by myself, it was challanging yet I thought it was a good learning experience and I've wrote like a thousand lines of code (eventhough later on I asked for the professor's opinion and found out I could write it 4 times shorter which I did afterwards). I also attended to this Unity course who was given by this crazy talented student who also was a freshman (and is #*@!ing succesful as a game developer already right now, he's gained scholarships and been on the newspaper and shit early this year). It was also fun. During summer I went to this event which lasted a few days and was a mixed thing with software, innovation, networking, seminars and parties, drinking, camping, fun. They've made a little game jam there which I've also attended. Eventhough I didn't last 48 hours but like 20 with lots of cigarette breaks etc, and ended up only being able to make my characters run around, I had a blast in general. But everything went downhill on my 2nd year and my 2nd and 3rd years went awfully wrong (3rd year being the sophomore year again since I failed with a gpa around 1.6 out of 4.0). I kind of blame staying at a dorm at 2nd year (I hate dorms so much) and becoming overly addicted to gaming thanks to starting stupid games of Overwatch and Paladins (they're competitive and they make you have to play everyday all day and grind currency & loot so you can get those stupid skins during limited time events; I quit both games and uninstalled them for good like 3 days ago cause they were cancer for my life). During these 2 years I didn't do any coding at all. We didn't have any classes with coding except for Database Systems which uses SQL. Instead we had several hardcore, God tier maths, 2 software engineering classes that they teach you about work life and approaches and stuff, they were fun but they didn't have anything to do with coding etc. And this, again God tier Algorithms and Data Structures class which I failed twice and is one of the most hard and boring things I've ever seen in my entire life. In conclusion, I know the maths and algorithms etc are necessary, but I loved coding and it was the basis of keeping my motivation somehow cause coding is practical and tangible and somewhat fun, and it keeps you want to learn and discover more as you go. But being away from it for 2 years which past with depression, social struggles and hardcore game addiction made me forget all about it and I'm so terrified of spending 3 years at uni and having almost 0 knowlegde and skill at this point. This keeps me from practicing or enjoying working on software at the moment.
  4. dsgus

    Want to gain sevap points??

    "Sevap" (which doesn't translate to English) is the antonym of sin. "Sevap points" is a joke like when I help my friend with something and she goes like "thank you thank you" I could say "ah it's nothing, I'm gaining sevap points afterall" etc. The title initially was "help me I don't know what I'm doing with my life" and I thought it was cringe and people didn't reply so I've upgraded it to a funny version eventhough no one would get the joke
  5. I don't know if this forum is the right place to post this but anyway... I'm a 20 years old junior software engineering student. I've always wanted to be a game developer and now I go to the uni & the department I've always wanted in order to achieve this goal. Yet, I suck so badly at school and most importantly, I still have almost 0 knowlegde about programming or anything related to my field. Basically all I know is really basic and now half (or mostly) forgotten knowlegde about C and C++ that they taught us in the freshman year, and some SQL from last semester. Since animation & art seemed to require more subjectivity and creativity (though I like to draw and stuff) I decided to end up being a game programmer since it's more straight forward and objective. Programming is the actual game itself and the rest of it is just polish (roughly) and I really adore & see John Carmack as my idol, and the fact that what made id Software's games revolutionary was their programming... are some other reasons why I want to be a programmer. Anyway, eventhough I get the proper education and all, I couldn't be less motivated & more clueless. I'm in a state where I think I wasted all my time to achieve my dreams doing nothing. Rarely when I feel kind of motivated to actually do something I get stuck having no idea what to do since I don't know anything. I try to watch tutorials and I don't understand what I'm doing. I've begun lots and lots of tutorials lately. I watch a couple of episodes and get confused and bored and give up. My last attempt was last week, I decided to start learning C++ all over again and learn it for real so I could move on to work on games. But I got really bored, the beginning parts were things that I already knew but I wanted to still go through them to make sure, then I didn't have enough patience for the rest of it cause I got bored and started to think "this isn't gonna help me". The conclusion is, I'm depressed, unmotivated, I don't know what I'm doing with my life. I don't wanna end up graduating from uni and become a waiter (I've tried working at several jobs during summer vacations, I couldn't stand any of them so I can't even become a waiter). I need guidance from someone that actually cares and will actually help me through, like a wise motivation buddy, I guess, since I don't see any hope in me succeeding anything by myself at this point. I doubt if anyone will even read this tho.
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