And I honestly do not remember when I was last happier.
It isn't so much that I enjoy being an assistant manager at Dairy Queen. Although, I do. Very much so. It is more that I have a vision again. A new goal for my life after the last faded years ago to the turmoil of earning those two degrees.
But I am getting ahead of myself, and I am down to eight and a half minutes. No time for dillies, and less time for dallies.
As I said, some fourteen months ago I graduated. I immediately began searching for employment, both with software firms [my first degree being in Computer Science], and with engineering firms [my second degree being in Electical Engineering]. I found employment difficult to find. As the months wore on, I realized the reason employers did not find me attractive was that I myself had little to no desire to work in either field. I love developing software, and I love developing hardware, and I especially love the magical realm where the two disciplines meet. But I simply could not envision myself doing it for a living. They are a hobby to me. A hobby I love, and will always love, but a hobby none the less. Not a career.
But what else could I do? I have, after all, nearly killed myself getting through college, not to mention putting myself rather seriously in debt, all to enter the very fields I was not discarding. I was distraught. It was not a happy couple of weeks as I searched my soul for some sign of what I should do.
Fortune and I have a very healthy relationship, and in this case it did not let me down. At the very same time I was was going through this dilemma, my brother was having trouble with Algebra, and attending study sessions with his teacher and a bunch of other students over the summer. As I was currently unemployed, I volunteered to help out in my spare time. The experience was, for lack of a better word, breathtaking. I felt satisfaction watching those kids grasp math that I never felt writing programs or building robots. It was a satisfaction that I have only felt in passing here on Gamedev, pretending I know enough about programming to help others in the General Programming forum.
It became immediately clear what I am meant to do. Teach. I've heard the jokes from my peers; those who can't, and so forth. I don't really care. This is what will make me happy, I am more certain of that then anything I've ever felt before.
And so I am returning to school. Apparently, to teach high school math requires actual coursework. Not much, of course, since I already have a degree in math. Just a handful of courses in education. And some reading and writing bull shit that the School of Mines never saw fit to officially teach me. I figure I could knock it out in a year, maybe three semesters, if I felt so inclined. But I've done the full time student thing, and I think I want to take a break from it. What's the hurry? I have my entire life ahead of me, and now that I have a goal I can enjoy myself for a while.
And yes, make ice cream for ten dollars an hour. Sure, its not the $40k a year job I was told to look forward to when I left highschool, but it is honest work, I get experience with Teenagers, and five nights a week I get a free meal. Really, what more could a guy want?
And so there you all have it. The quick and dirty summary of where Conner McCloud is. I am sure you have all been dying for an update on my amazing life, and I am more than happy to oblige. And for those of you living in the greater Denver area, feel free to swing by my store. I promise I'll give the brasier guy a stern talking to should he spit in your meal.
