While the philosopher in me applauds your application of the Heisenberg uncertainty principle, you are however blatantly incorrect in this instance.And the LOL of the day award goes tooooooooooooooo....
Also, I recall from reading the 80386 manual that member offset access is optimized by use of a different addressing method in the hardware. Adding that to the cache I'd imagine that in the majority of cases the value (or call address) is already on hand when required.