The most ironic ways to die
Author
Premise: you are an established high jumper with a personal best of 2.48. You are escaping from Mexican bloodhounds because you stole somebody's drug money. Things are going bad until you reach a fence that is 2.30 meters high, includes some barb wire to catch your attention and there's a small sign near the ground that says "Warning: 10000 volts. Touch not, dude.". You are wearing sneakers and shorts. The goons after you have knives, but no guns. US soil is behind the fence, but there is no gate. You know that the US would lauch a tactical nuking spree against the perpetrators if you were to be killed on US soil. You have 8 seconds to make a decision.
Decision: You decide to jump.
Aftermath: You die because you land head first on the rocks of Liberty.
Premise: You steal an ambulance in a high-speed chase away from the police.
You get into a car accident.
Teh irony: As you lay dying, you realize that you need an ambulance.
You get into a car accident.
Teh irony: As you lay dying, you realize that you need an ambulance.
Premise: You are on the battlefield during a battle. A grenade lands near you and blows off your arms and legs (or at least renders them useless). You are laying there when a medic runs up and begins to bandage your wounds, the medic gets shot and falls forward on top of your face.
Unable to move you sufficate and die.
Unable to move you sufficate and die.
You are wearing wrinkled clothes. Your boss will kill you if you come to today's meeting dressed like that. In a panic you run over to the local Wal*Mart and steal an iron. While running out the door you trip and impale your face on the iron.
Now that is irony. [grin]
Now that is irony. [grin]
You go outside and you think to yourself:
"Boy wouldn't it be funny if a grand piano dropped from a great height and landed on my head, because just the other day I was joking with my friends that since I'm a world famous piano player, it would be a terribly ironic way to die"
And just as you are thinking that, a grand piano smashes onto the pavement next to you, missing you by mere inches. Then an iron falls out of the sky and lands on your head, killing you instantly.
"Boy wouldn't it be funny if a grand piano dropped from a great height and landed on my head, because just the other day I was joking with my friends that since I'm a world famous piano player, it would be a terribly ironic way to die"
And just as you are thinking that, a grand piano smashes onto the pavement next to you, missing you by mere inches. Then an iron falls out of the sky and lands on your head, killing you instantly.
While reading and replying to this thread, it occurs to you that you have no life whatsoever, and are therefore dead. [wink]
Quote:Original post by ricekrispyw
While reading and replying to this thread, it occurs to you that you have no life whatsoever, and are therefore dead. [wink]
Nice one. Rating++;
Although, it could use some work to make even funnier
/MindWipe
You decide not to ride motorcycles anymore because they are dangerous. One day while driving around in your car, you cross an intersection as a motorcyclist is running a red light the other way and crashes through your side window killing you.
This topic is closed to new replies.
Advertisement
Popular Topics
Advertisement
