Quote:Original post by pothb
Its not hard, its only hard if you're planning to make one that everyone will be pleased with. I'm sure there hasn't been one badguy yet with a sexual background with horses. But can you make him a cool bad guy?
Why not? Centaurs have feelings too, y'know!
...
INT. EVIL LAIR, TORTURE CHAMBER -- NIGHT.JAMES WAND is strapped to a chair suspended over a vat of bubbling, boiling liquid. MISTRESS BUTTERCUP is standing beside him, sneering evilly. We can just see someone emptying the last bulk container of Crisp'n'Dry cooking oil into the vat. [PRODUCER NOTE: Can we get an MCU on this? The product placement money would be handy!]
WAND
You fiend, Buttercup! Wait 'til M25 hears about this!
They'll run rings around your evil empire!
BUTTERCUP
Hah! I shall destroy your M25 colleagues just as I did for you!
WAND
(struggling to free himself; no chance!)
What do you expect me to do? Talk?
BUTTERCUP
(giggles)
Talk? Why no, Mr. Wand! I expect you to
fry!WAND
You'll never get away with this, Buttercup!
BUTTERCUP nods to a minion. Levers are pulled, buttons pressed and the overly complex machinery starts to lower WAND into the vat. WAND begins to sweat with fear as BUTTERCUP skips from the room, laughing uproariously. WAND screams just as we...
CUT TO:INT. EVIL LAIR, BUTTERCUP'S BEDROOM -- CONTINUOUS.We see a very large bed. On it lies a French centaur, BLACQUE BEAUTÉ. He's waiting...
BUTTERCUP enters. Her eyes light up.
BUTTERCUP
Blacque! You came! What a pleasant surprise!
BLACQUE
Ah, mon cherie! Busy day at ze office, oui?
BUTTERCUP
(she climbs into bed alongside BLACQUE and begins to run her fingers over him)
Oh my dear, dear Blacque! You don't know the half of it!
BLACQUE
'Ere! Let me take away vôtre worries!
...
Sean Timarco Baggaley (Est. 1971.)Warning: May contain bollocks.